Blijf altijd koel

[Geert S]

Volgende stukje in het Engels is afkomstig van een ander forum, maar is interessant genoeg voor een discussie-stuk, weet niet of ik het er helemaal altijd mee eens ben maar het is zeker de moeite van het lezen waard voor nieuwkomers.

Be Cool

Daeng and Somchai were walking down Phosi Road in Udon. It was a hot, sunny day in early April. They had just had some nice, spicy som tum, and washed it down with several shots of rice whisky, as one does this time of year.
“Oi!,” said Daeng “the sun is hot today.”
“That’s not the sun, it’s the moon,” said Somchai.
Daeng looks at his friend in amazement, and laughs as he replies: “Somchai, you’re crazy - of course it’s the sun.”
“You’re the one whose crazy”, said Daeng “everyone knows that that is the moon.”
They start to argue with each other, and within a few minutes they have both lost their tempers and start slugging it out in the street.
An interested crowd of onlookers soon assembles to watch the show, as they do.
After a few minutes of fighting they pause - exhausted, bruised and dirty. Daeng comes slightly to his senses, and says, “Look, this is ridiculous - why don’t we ask someone?”
Somchai is too tired to argue, so nods.
Daeng asks a timid looking chap in the front row of the crowd, “Pee (big brother) - help us sort this out, will you? - is that up there the sun or the moon?”
The unwitting stranger looks extremely uncomfortable as he thinks of an answer, before replying: “Uhhh… I don’t know. I don’t come from round here.”

If a nation’s humor says something about a people, then this old Thai joke says a lot. Somchai is clearly insane to believe the sun is the moon. Daeng should have humored him, since it is very bad manners to disagree with anyone about anything in Thailand. However, Daeng was off his guard, a bit tipsy, and in his surprise, made the mistake of contradicting his friend.

The Thai attitude to disagreement stems from a basic tolerance of the viewpoint of others. What I believe is right for me is right for me. What you believe is right for you is right for you. I have no right to challenge that. To criticize your viewpoint would show a lack of respect for you - and vice versa.

This non-judgmental side of the Thai character is, for many foreigners, one of Thailand’s most endearing qualities, but it does have its drawbacks. It allows a greater freedom of the individual than many other societies, but this freedom can easily be misused. Without the moral code of Buddhism (which many say is declining), a lack of public or private censure can allow selfish and criminal behavior to go unchecked. It also sometimes gets Thailand into hot water internationally. Harboring such horrific characters as Pol Pot and Khun Sa, and maintaining good relations with the Burmese leadership is often misconstrued internationally as condoning them. It is not so - it is merely Thai “civility”.

Back to our joke. Once the argument about the sun or the moon began, Somchai and Daeng had lost their tempers - or gone moho to use the Thai word. This should not happen. Keeping your temper - “chay yen or cool heart” - is the first law of social interaction in Thailand. Whatever happens, keep cool and keep smiling is the imperative. Any display of animosity is a childish weakness and is much despised.

I am afraid few Westerners are very good at this. I remember almost having a traffic accident. I was, I’m ashamed to say, almost running a red light. So was a driver coming in from my side. There was a screech of brakes, and our cars ended up stationary and almost touching each other. I reacted as most Westerners would, shaking my fists and swearing. The Thai driver smiled gently at me and put his hands together in a (so I felt at the time) condescending wai. I managed to smile weakly back after a few seconds (more of a grimace really) and no harm was done. Except to my ego. I felt thoroughly humiliated by this man’s total control compared to my total lack of it.

This constant self-control and apparent serenity is only possible up to a point. A Thai who is stretched too far will suddenly lose control - all control - and their behavior is then completely unpredictable. Any Thai seeing this in another will back off rapidly for their own protection. What many Thais fail to understand about Westerners is that we do not have this imperative to “keep cool”. We can show anger and still be well under control. It is disconcerting at times to get a little irritated and be treated as though one was Jack the Ripper!

The punch line of our joke was actually the perfect Thai answer to an insane question. “Is that the sun or the moon?” The poor onlooker was put in an impossible position. He was being asked to take sides with one of two obviously deranged and dangerous people. His answer was a masterpiece. “I don’t know” would have been enough, but a reason why: “I don’t come from ‘round here,” was a stroke of genius.

If you want to be liked and get anything done in Thailand, be cool. Displays of anger are not only impolite, they are usually counterproductive. The angry tourist who shouts at reception that his shower is broken is likely to be gently placated and his problem duly ignored. Far better to look sorrowful and explain that you may be stupid but you can’t get the shower to work, and you are hot and tired, and need their help. Then you are likely to find sympathy and a rapid repair. You have then put yourself in a “low face” position, and they have gained face. “Face” is equally as important as “cool” in Thailand - but that’s another story.


© Jeff Petry (udonmap.com)

[Pieter]

Ok hier ook een leuke

Een ver familielid van m'n vrouw, een alleenstaande man die sinds 6 maanden nu trouwens definitief monnik is geworden en is gestopt met drinken. was daarvoor eigenlijk altijd bezopen.

Hij bleef echter grappig (sommige hebben dat.)
Oma stuurde hem soms weg als hij teveel stonk omdat hij gewoon in zijn broek pieste maar goed...

Op een morgen waren zo'n honderd schoenen vermist ; wat bleek onze dronken dorpsgek was zijn schoenen verloren en was zo boos geworden dat hij alle schoenen verzameld dat die hij maar kon vinden en in de plomp gegooid. (onder het mom van Ikke Nie en Gij ook nie en gene ene van Bonanza)

Pieter